# spank

Slap your MacBook, it yells back.

> "this is the most amazing thing i've ever seen" — [@kenwheeler](https://x.com/kenwheeler)

> "I just ran sexy mode with my wife sitting next to me...We died laughing" — [@duncanthedev](https://x.com/duncanthedev)

> "peak engineering" — [@tylertaewook](https://x.com/tylertaewook)

Uses the Apple Silicon accelerometer (Bosch BMI286 IMU via IOKit HID) to detect physical hits on your laptop and plays audio responses. Single binary, no dependencies.

## Requirements

- macOS on Apple Silicon (M2+)
- `sudo` (for IOKit HID accelerometer access)

## Install

Download from the [latest release](https://github.com/taigrr/spank/releases/latest).

Or build from source:

```bash
go install github.com/taigrr/spank@latest
```

## Usage

```bash
# Normal mode — says "ow!" when slapped
sudo spank

# Sexy mode — escalating responses based on slap frequency
sudo spank --sexy

# Halo mode — plays Halo death sounds when slapped
sudo spank --halo
```

### Modes

**Pain mode** (default): Randomly plays from 10 pain/protest audio clips when a slap is detected.

**Sexy mode** (`--sexy`): Tracks slaps within a rolling 5-minute window. The more you slap, the more intense the audio response. 60 levels of escalation.

**Halo mode** (`--halo`): Randomly plays from death sound effects from the Halo video game series when a slap is detected.

## How it works

1. Reads raw accelerometer data directly via IOKit HID (Apple SPU sensor)
2. Runs vibration detection (STA/LTA, CUSUM, kurtosis, peak/MAD)
3. When a significant impact is detected, plays an embedded MP3 response
4. 500ms cooldown between responses to prevent rapid-fire

## Credits

Sensor reading and vibration detection ported from [olvvier/apple-silicon-accelerometer](https://github.com/olvvier/apple-silicon-accelerometer).

## License

MIT